You can fly anywhere, as long as you fly to Columbus, Ohio
An obscure new airline will soon set up shop in our fair Lindbergh Field, the extremely cheap carrier Skybus. The model sounds great. They promise extremely cheap fares, kind service, and non-stop flights. And it’s true, the fares are extremely cheap. You can get to Columbus, Ohio for $50 one way, which would be great if I wanted to go to Columbus. Unfortunately, I never want to go to Columbus. Ever.
So when they really say “non-stop” they mean “one stop in Columbus,” right? No. Because Skybus won’t book connecting flights. You have to self-book a second flight from Columbus to, say, Boston (I’ll dispense with the silly example of flying San Diego to San Fran via Columbus). But if you do that, you have to pickup any checked luggage and recheck it, which means going out and back in through security (it also means paying another $10 per bag checked luggage fee). And they have a no refund policy if you miss your flight. If your flight is delayed in San Diego, and you miss the connecting flight, that’s money out the window.
So when they say “We want to make flying easier,” they mean “We’re going to make going anywhere you actually want to go to be a huge, and risky, pain in the ass.”
I did speak with the Skybus spokesman, Bob Tenenbaum. He regaled me with stories of people staying overnight in Columbus to make a connection, or the family described in the L.A. Times who flew to Columbus and then drove to Atlanta. He told me about how Columbus is the 15th biggest city in the country and that 6.5 million people live within two hours drive of the city. He told me all that before he told me that Skybus has no plans to add another hub city or to add flights between its destinations (like San Diego to San Fran, direct). So it’s a pain in the rear, and will remain so for the foreseeable future.
But now let’s go back and look at the main selling point, price. They advertise super cheap fares – $10, $30, really amazing fares. Well that would be nice, but the seats at those prices are sold out. You can’t get from San Diego to Columbus for less than $50 for the next 6 months. Prices go up to $100 and $130 on weekends. Now let’s look at Southwest Airlines. Southwest to Columbus in August will run you $210. Advantage Skybus. But Southwest also flies to Boston for $210. Advantage Southwest. If you miss your plane, they’ll get you onto the next flight. Advantage Southwest. And they’ll transfer your bags on a connection. Advantage Southwest. And since I never want to go Columbus, well, advantage Southwest. Game, set, and match.
“Skybus…your sucky, doomed alternative.”
“Skybus…repopulating Columbus, Ohio onle missed flight at a time.”
Uh, maybe Skybus will be available to take Michael Vu back to Ohio. He can easily drive up to Cuyahoga County and reestablish his bad name there. Actually, he’s originally from Utah. Uh-oh. Does that mean he’s setting up here to help Romney?. Hmmm. Mybe we can hire SkyBus to fly Vu away.
This is great for me…I just moved to SD from Columbus. I bought 2 round-trip non-stop tickets for $241 for labor day weekend!
Dude, you’re ruining the whole “No one wants to go to Columbus” premise!
Thanks for being a good sport about the mocking of your home city, and welcome to SD.
Dude, you’re ruining the whole “no one wants to go to Columbus” premise!
Oh well. Thanks for being a good sport about mocking your home town.
Is there a reason you “never want to go to Columbus”? Have you heard some horrifying story about Columbus that you can share with us? Or do you have something against Christopher Columbus that automatically makes you dislike any place named after him?
I’ve been to many places around the United States and Columbus ranks right up there with the best cities. Since it is in the middle of the country, it’s a popular spot for companies to launch new products, it’s the birthplace of Wendy’s, and it’s got a thriving and vibrant student population with both the Ohio State University (the largest campus in the United States) and several other smaller colleges and universities.
For me, I traveled to Columbus twice last year for business and will likely travel there again in the next few years. So, anything that makes travel quicker and cheaper for me is a good thing.
I always wondered where the square-hamburger concept originated. I’m going there, now.
wow so original. hating on columbus. maybe you could be original some time? that would be great. maybe just go back to hating on san diego? that’s what you’re used to doing. stop being hacky.
I’ve never been to San Diego. I’d love to come check it out sometime soon via Skybus. I really don’t know much about the city nor what to expect, but I’m always willing to try new things with an open mind.
Are these kinds of comments welcome on a blog such as this one? Or should I try to inject more unfounded and unnecessary negativity into my comments so that they fit in better?
oops too late to go back. already hit submit.
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Walker (in Columbus)
you mean skybus is not attracting bitter bloggers from southern California to join us in Columbus? well then, the whole scheme is a loss.
You might enjoy reading some of James Thurber’s essays. He was the first blogger from Columbus.
“Game, set, match?” No one is twisting your arm to fly Skybus. Furthermore, Columbus is doing just fine despite the opinions of people like you. I really think you are doing your readers a disservice by spouting off on a topic on which you haven’t a clue. You hear Columbus and all kinds of narrow minded, stereotypical rhetoric comes spewing out. You know, I’ve never been to SD. I haven’t heard much about SD. No one talks about how fantastic SD is or how great the restaurants are. I’ve never heard of SD’s art community or how wonderful the museums are. Universities? Haven’t heard about those either. But in spite of those facts, I’d never say I will never visit SD. Experience is the spice of life. Don’t deprive yourself or your readers of the experience.
Jonzun (Columbus, Born and Raised!)
Can I get a Short North shout out from anyone? What’s that? Not from the author? … You mean to say–he’s never actually set foot in C-bus? But only a sun-baked, provincial hack would write a review of a city without actually going there.